Like a Shepherd

IT IS FRIDAY. I never realize how badly I need a weekend until I do something stupid at work… my dumb mistakes always happen on Fridays… not adding the deposit up correctly, putting the wrong dates on things, or (as was the case this morning) sending a service ticket with the description “Atntyue” to every person (all 9) in our company plus the customer. OBVIOUSLY I WAS NOT ON MY GAME.

Sigh.

So yes, I am excited about a weekend. As I just told my husband, I am super excited about doing things around the house… maybe I read too many blogs by pregnant women, and have too many pregnant friends… but I need to clean everything. Seriously. The other day I FINALLY dusted the base boards because it was driving me insane. Thinking about a morning of dusting, vacuuming, and scrubbing strangely warms my heart. (PS I don’t know who I am anymore.)

Our weekend plans? If you hadn’t gathered, some cleaning is on the docket. Otherwise, pretty sure there is some West Wing, Downton, and The Office in our weekend.

Our date night on Wednesday was really fun! We enjoyed dinner at Red Robin and got some productive shopping done. (Finally, I think I have shorts that I like!) I am so excited about simple things right now… last night we had dinner together, I did laundry, watched American Idol and worked on my crochet. Simple, yet I had so much fun. Maybe I have been enjoying these little things because we have been looking forward, and trying to plan… and, frankly it is overwhelming. It’s hard to say “in 5 years, we’ll do this…” because I don’t feel ready. In 5 years, I probably will… but last night I just needed clean socks.

As I told my wonderful friend Elise who I desperately wish I lived next door to, we’re making plans with open hands. I thought I wanted my Master’s (ehh I’d rather have kids), I thought we had the 5 year plan to focus on just the two of us (but Aaron is living with us), and I thought we would have everything figured out (not. even. the. foggiest.). Plans change, but God leads. There is no doubt in my mind that we are where we’re supposed to be, and that we’re doing what we’re supposed to be doing. One of the greatest comforts, to me, is that God knows and holds our hearts. He knows our deepest desires, and is not a fickle boy who may break the heart He holds in His hands, but He is a loving shepherd that leads us.

Jesus, like a shepherd lead us; much we need thy tender care.

These are things I’ve been thinking. There is joy in the laundry, for right now that means an evening of leisure and relaxation because I don’t have mountains of it. I have small loads but I anticipate the days when there will be mountains, because that will mean there are more laundry makers under my care (hopefully they will have dimples and blue eyes like me). Today, I spend my working days in the office instead of the home, but it serves a purpose. It is where my shepherd has led me, though I often struggle to appreciate it.

[For the record, THIS is why I need to write. I just made sense of everything and connected all the dots through typing.]

 

Dear Josh,

I am thankful for our little home. I’m thankful for the ways it has been used to bless others, and I’m thankful we have a policy of an open door and open hands. We have learned so much in the last year about making plans as they crumbled apart after a terrible job, a totaled car, and a debilitating virus.
I’m thankful for the job I have that allows us to do all the things we do- which is a lot. Traveling, paying loans, hosting friends and family, and supporting Aaron’s growth. As we were reflecting yesterday, we have come so far in the past 3 years of knowing each other, and I’m excited to see where we will be in 3 more years. 🙂  Meanwhile, we will enjoy fine dining of Mexican chicken and rice, and enjoy fine entertainment (The Office). Before we know it, these simple days spent together will turn into years we have spent together and I intend to enjoy each moment.
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